What does it mean to love?

I have seen things in Africa that have helped me to understand what it is to truly love. Not the kind of superficial love that only deals with the pleasant things in life but the love that speaks to the hard places in life.

There is a woman here by the name of Lydia who cares for her grandchildren who are orphans as well as an older woman with leprosy (Ania). Lydia herself is a grandma, she isn’t young. She should be enjoying her “golden Years” and instead of receiving care she is busy giving care. She gives of her time, her energy, her “wealth” and most of all, she gives of her love. Ania struggles with leprosy, she has no fingers and most of her toes are gone. She has open wounds where the flies love to nest. She has broken her hip and can hardly get around. She isn’t one of the lovely by the world standards and I’m sure there are many days when Lydia wants to rest, to take life easy. But she doesn’t, she works so that her grandchildren can have a better life. She works so her friend can have food to eat. She shares all she has with others in a way I’m not sure most of us would be willing to do. She inspires me to look beyond myself and see the needs of others. To share what I have with those around me.

She makes me realize how much I have been given and how little time I spend giving to others, even to those I love let alone to those who are “unlovely”. I don’t know if Lydia knows God but she exemplifies the love the Lord has for us. She teaches me what real deep love looks like. What it means to be Jesus to another human being.

I have realized how much I look out for “#1” and how little I look beyond myself and what I need or want. These people who have nothing freely offer what they do have to a neighbor or a friend or a stranger for that matter. We have everything we can ever really need and yet we hold onto our little stashes with all our might. Why is that? Why is it that those who have so much share so little really and those who have so little share all they own? They understand how much it means to someone to just simply sit, offer yourself to them by offering your time. Today we are going to visit an orphan family and I get the privilege of going to spend time and work for a family. The head of this family is an older woman, a grandma who has lost one leg to a landmine. She cares for her daughter who is blind. She gets firewood, water, and tends the garden everyday with her one leg and her crutch. She gives her all she has and today we get to care for her just a little. I pray I can practice the Gospel of presence with her. To love her deeply even if it is just for a little while. I pray that the Lord will show her how much he loves her through what we do today and that he will let me be there, truly be there with her today.

I wrote the above last night. Today we spend time with this grandma and her blind daughter. The blind daughter had gone early in the morning to walk a long way to get firewood and then find her way home again. I couldn't believe it. The grandma didn't really want us to do much. We ended up sitting with her. It was actually very hard to sit and not do. This gospel of presence is hard work. I want to do, to fill the silence, to do something tangible. Yet she wanted us to be there with her...just to be present. It was hard and yet beautiful. I learned that this means a lot to her. At the end of the day we prayed for her and then Jean asked if she would pray for us. I was so close to tears during that prayer. I have never felt the power of God so clearly or so deeply as I did today. I won't ever forget that. Tomorrow we are going back and even though I learned a lot today about the Gospel of presence my humanity still says "I want to DO something for her". I'm not sure what to pray for except that we would be open to what the Lord wants to do in and through us.

practicing the Gospel of presence
Shannon